Have you ever experienced a situation where a guy seems to be acting mean or rude towards you, but deep down, you suspect that he might actually have feelings for you?
I can imagine the confusion and frustration already because you expect a guy who likes you to be kind and nice and take an interest in you.
Whether you’re currently dealing with a guy who seems to be acting mean towards you, or you simply want to better understand this behavior, keep reading to know why guys can be mean when they like you.
11 Reasons Why Guys Are Mean When They Like You
1. They’re Afraid of Rejection
Rejection is not a pleasant feeling, one we run away from, especially men who are more ego-driven.
So a major reason why guys are mean when they like you is because they’re afraid of being rejected.
They may be afraid that if they show their true feelings, you’ll reject them and hurt their feelings in the process.
This is especially true if they don’t know you very well or if they don’t think you’re interested in them.
This fear can lead to some pretty nasty behavior on the part of the guy.
He likes you.
He just doesn’t want to be rejected and hurt.
2. They’re Not Used to Expressing Their Feelings
It’s not uncommon for guys to be less comfortable with expressing their feelings than girls are.
Many guys are not used to expressing their feelings openly, so they may resort to mean behavior as a way of showing their interest.
They may also be uncomfortable with the idea of being vulnerable and expressing their true feelings.
If a guy you suspect likes you act mean to you, he might not know how else to show that he cares about you.
This is particular to guys who haven’t had much experience with relationships.
3. They’re Trying to Test Your Reactions
Another reason guys may be mean when they like you is that they’re trying to test your reactions.
They think if they act mean, you will respond in a way that shows them how much you like them.
It’s a means of gauging your interest in them without having to directly ask what you feel.
They might also be testing whether you’ll still like them even when they’re being mean, a way to see if you truly care.
4. They’re Trying to Get Your Attention
You may be surprised to learn that some guys are mean because they like you.
It can be a way to get your attention, especially if you haven’t been responding to their advances.
By acting mean, they think you’ll be more likely to pay attention to them and how they feel.
It’s a way of showing that they care about you to do something drastic. lol
5. It’s a Way of Flirting
This sounds twisted, but it’s true – a lot of guys flirt by being mean.
They tease you and put you down, but in an affectionate way that lets you know there’s more to their attitude than just anger.
This is especially true if the meanness is mixed in with compliments or other signs of attraction.
They are trying to show you how much they like you but in a strange and confusing way.
So, even though it doesn’t seem like it, meanness can be a form of flirting.
Of course, this isn’t true for everyone.
Some guys are just plain mean and don’t have any romantic feelings behind their words.
6. They’re Jealous
Jealousy is a powerful motivator, and some guys may act mean out of jealousy.
They may be jealous of other guys who they perceive as being better than them or as having more success with you.
Their meanness may be a way of trying to assert their dominance or superiority.
7. They’re Intimidated By You
It’s possible that a guy who likes you is acting mean to you because he finds you intimidating.
He may be so attracted to you that he can’t find the words to express himself or is too scared of making a mistake or being rejected.
In this case, his meanness could be coming from a place of insecurity rather than malice.
8. They’re Inexperienced in Relationships
If a guy is inexperienced in relationships, he may not know how to act appropriately around someone he’s attracted to or likes.
He may be trying too hard and instead coming off as mean or rude without meaning to.
9. They’re Trying to Protect Themselves
Some guys may be trying to protect themselves from getting too close to a girl, or they might feel like being mean will make them appear cool or uninterested.
This is often the case for guys who are trying to hide their true feelings, so they may try to push you away before you get too close.
It’s because they are afraid of being hurt.
10. They’re Intimidated By You
Sometimes guys can be intimidated by a girl who is confident and independent.
They may feel like they don’t measure up, or they may feel inadequate in terms of their looks, income level or life experience compared to you.
This might cause them to become defensive or treat you with disrespect out of insecurity.
Not cool, but yeah, it happens.
11. They’re Trying to Impress You
Some guys may be trying to impress you and show that they are strong and capable.
They may also be trying to show that they are not intimidated by you or by the situation.
This is especially true if he is younger than you or not as rich as you, since it’s likely that he will feel like he needs to prove himself in order for you to like him back.
These are common reasons why guys might act tough and give off a certain attitude when they like you.
Even though he may be trying to show strength, it doesn’t mean that you have to accept his behaviour or put up with any kind of disrespect or mean attitude.
It’s not necessary to engage in any kind of power struggle; instead, you can make an effort to show him that there are other ways to express his feelings and get your attention without being intimidating or aggressive.
For example, you can invite him for coffee or some other kind of hangout, talk about common interests, tell jokes, be yourself and act friendly towards him.
This will help to put him at ease and make it easier for him to open up and tell you how he truly feels.
If you can’t do this, set boundaries and don’t let him get away with being mean to you.