9 Reasons He Likes You But Makes No Effort To Ask You Out

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Life is often not as straightforward as it may seem.

There are many potholes, hills, slopes, and muddy waters in the way of life.

One of the ways this is played out is in the matter of relationship – most times, a relationship goes like this: you want someone, you pursue them, and you get them (or not).

But there are other times when it goes like this: you want someone, but you make no effort to get them.

Now, this one is a shift away from the normal and obtainable, but it happens every day in life, and as a lady, it is important that you know why a man will like you but will be hesitant to make the effort required to get you.

Understanding the intricate dynamics of relationships can often feel like trying to solve a complex puzzle, but in this article, we have outlined nine comprehensive reasons a man may like you but make no effort.

9 Reasons He Likes You But Makes No Effort To Ask You Out

1. Fear of Rejection

Reasons He Likes You But Makes No Effort

One of the most common reasons why someone might like you but make no effort is the fear of rejection.

This fear is one that plagues a lot of people secretly.

Although people do not regularly talk about it, many people are scared of being rejected.

It could concern a job employment opportunity, a relationship opportunity, or any other thing.

The fear of rejection has held lots and lots of people back from reaching their potential or achieving success.

So, if he is plagued with this fear, he may hesitate to take the plunge and put himself out there, with the fear that you might not feel the same way about him or that you will give him an outright “no.”


2. Emotional Baggage

Sometimes, past relationships or personal issues can affect a person’s ability to invest emotionally in a new relationship.

This is why it is often advised that people should leave the troubles of their past relationships together with the relationship.

You see, carrying baggage from the past into the present and future has never done anything good for anyone.

Instead, it robs people of a chance to get better things.

No way anything will be able to get into a hand that is already full.

This is why a man may like you but is unable to reach out to you.

He’s got no space in his hands because he is holding on to unresolved emotional baggage.

3. Unclear Signals

Reasons He Likes You But Makes No Effort

Sometimes, you will find a man who likes a woman but needs to know if she likes him before he makes his move.

This can also stem from the fear of rejection, and it could be from some other thing.

However, if your signals are not signaling him towards you, he may just prefer to stay aside.

If you like him too and would want him to know that, your communication, whether verbal or non-verbal, must be clear and concise.

Miscommunication often leads to mixed signals.

As long as he is unsure about your feelings or intentions, he may continue to hold back just to save himself from potential embarrassment, awkwardness or even rejection.

4. Prioritizing Other Commitments

Life can get busy, and people often have various commitments, such as work, family, or personal goals.

It is true that it is good for people to have a partner in their lives with whom they can share their life, and it is also correct that life is easier when there is someone beside you, but a lot of people do not share this sentiment.

And this can be for many reasons.

If a person has had a partner that discouraged their growth rather than supported and encouraged it, they will most likely choose to grow by themselves rather than with a partner.

Also, a person who has experienced a serious breakdown in productivity and growth due to a failed relationship will want to decide to fulfill the projects they have at hand before launching into another relationship.

So it is possible that he genuinely likes you but has limited time and energy to invest in a relationship at that moment.

5. Insecurity

Reasons He Likes You But Makes No Effort

Insecurity can play a significant role in a person’s reluctance to make an effort in a budding relationship.

This insecurity may play out in different ways.

One of which is self-doubt.

If he doubts the worthiness of your love and affection or fears that he may not be able to meet your standard or can’t live up to your expectations, he might decide to hold down.

Another way insecurity may play out is his doubt on your own trustworthiness.

If he perceives that you are not a trustworthy person, or he suspects that you will disappoint him in the relationship, he may decide not to take a move even when he really does like you.

6. Enjoying the Chase

People have different things that give them excitement.

While this may seem unbelievable, some individuals actually do enjoy the thrill of pursuit more than the actual relationship itself.

They may like the excitement of getting your attention but lose interest once they feel they’ve “won” you.

If your man is in this category, he most likely won’t chase you.

And the reason is that he fears that he will lose interest in you if you accept his proposal.

Until he is able to deal with this challenge, he may likely not reach you.

7. Different Relationship Goals

Reasons He Likes You But Makes No Effort

People often have different reasons they get into a relationship and different things they want out of a relationship.

If a man likes you, he will follow you silently to know your thoughts on the relationship and to see if they align with his.

He may even ask you subtle questions on some matters.

If you suspect that a man likes you, you should review your relationship goals to see if they align with his, too.

Sometimes, it could be that he is not looking for the same level of commitment or intimacy as you are.

He might be looking for something more casual while you are seeking a serious commitment.

When he knows this, he won’t bother to make a move.

8. Personal Growth and Development

There are different stages in people’s lives.

But there are very few people who are wise enough to recognize what stage is good for what.

If people who are still struggling with finding themselves get into a relationship, they will only succeed in putting a burden on their partners.

If a relationship must succeed, then both partners must be whole.

Knowing this, a man who likes you may decipher that it isn’t the time to be with you yet.

He would prioritize his personal growth and development over being in a romantic relationship with you.

And for the right reasons- to ready himself for a beautiful and successful relationship with you.

9. Lack of Clarity About Their Own Feelings

Reasons He Likes You But Makes No Effort

Lastly, there are the people who are not sure of what they feel.

And there are others who are sure of what they feel but unsure of what they want.

The first set are the ones who truly like someone but can’t tell if it’s love, admiration, or infatuation.

Then, the latter are people who do not know if they truly want to invest in the relationship commitment at that time of their lives or if they just want a fling with you.

In this confusion, a man may really like you, but because of the many unanswered questions in his mind, he won’t make an effort to reach or get you.


Being faced with this situation can be a bit frustrating, especially if you like the man in question.

There are several ways to handle it, even though it may be better to just leave it be.

You can approach the situation with wisdom and ask him questions that should help you understand the state of his heart.

Other times, all you need to get him up and doing is to declare your own interests in him.

Anyway, addressing the situation allows you to know what direction you need to take to have a beautiful life and/or a successful relationship.

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