Have you ever looked at your boyfriend and thought, “Does he even love me?”
Not in a cute or insecure way, but in a “something is kinda wrong here” way.
If you’re wondering whether he loves you, he probably doesn’t.
Like I tell women all the time, ”If a man loves you, you will know. If he doesn’t, you’ll be confused.”
Because real love doesn’t make you question it.
But fake love makes you confused and makes you search for signs he’s pretending to love you at 2 am, trying to figure out if what you’re feeling is real or if you’re just being paranoid.
Sorry, but here are signs he pretends to love you:
6 SIGNS HE PRETENDS TO LOVE YOU
1. He’s Only Sweet When He Wants Something
Who only shows you love when they want something?
A user, that’s who.
Dude is sweet when he wants something and suddenly available when it benefits him.
But when you need him, he’s never there for you.
You’ve noticed his effort is transactional.
He gives just enough to get what he wants, then disappears until he needs something else.
You can predict his behavior based on what he wants.
If he wants sex, he’ll be the most attentive boyfriend in the world.
Texting, calling, being all sweet, and making time.
The moment he gets what he wants, he’s back to being distant.
All I know is that a man who loves you shows up consistently, not just when he wants something from you.
2. He Doesn’t Know You
There’s a difference between knowing about someone and knowing someone.
Knowing about you is knowing your name, where you work, your favorite color, like basic facts anyone could learn in five minutes.
Knowing you is different.
It’s understanding what drives you, what scares you, what makes you come alive, what keeps you up at night thinking….
You know, things that people who only show genuine interest in you would know.
Like your childhood stories, your dreams beyond “I want to be successful, your insecurities that you don’t advertise, what you’re passionate about when no one’s watching…
Like, there are a lot of deep things you can know about someone if you really care.
Unfortunately, your man doesn’t know these things about you.
And honestly, he doesn’t even care to know more.
Because when you try to share these things, he’s not listening.
His eyes glaze over, he checks his phone, or changes the subject to something he actually cares about.
Men who love you want to know you.
They ask questions, listen, and remember details you mentioned months ago.
Men who are pretending don’t care a hoot.
3. He Treats You Differently Around Other People
When it’s just the two of you, he acts like he cares.
But the moment other people are around, he’s different, more like cold, as if he doesn’t want anyone to know he’s with you.
No hand-holding in public or introducing you as his girlfriend.
No PDA, nothing that shows the world that you’re together.
Because he’s keeping his options open and he doesn’t want to be too publicly committed to you in case something better comes along.
Or he’s embarrassed of you because you don’t fit the image he wants to project.
When a man loves you, he wants people to know it.
It’s men who are pretending to love you that keep you at arm’s length the moment anyone else is watching.
4. Everything Is Casual, Nothing Is Serious
Of course, no one is saying you should be talking about marriage, future, and serious things all the time.
But if you’ve been together for a while and all he wants to do is keep things casual, you, my dear, are a placeholder.
Not his girlfriend, just someone who’s filling space until something better comes along.
That’s why you hear things like,
“Let’s just see where things go.”
“Can’t we just enjoy the moment?”
Real meaning: “I don’t see a future with you, but I’m comfortable enough to keep this going for now.”
Men who love you want to lock it down; they want commitment because they don’t want to lose you.
Everything is vague and undefined with a pretender.
5. You’ve Never Met Anyone Important To Him
Months into the relationship, and you still haven’t met his friends or his family, or anyone who actually matters to him, even his pet.
And when you bring it up, he has excuses.
Oh, they’re busy.
The timing isn’t right.
He wants to wait until things are more serious.
They’re toxic. bla bla blaÂ
But things are serious.
You’ve been together for six months, a year or longer.
So why are you still a secret?
Because he doesn’t see a future with you!
And introducing you to his people would make it official and require actual commitment.
And he’s not willing to commit to someone he doesn’t love.
6. Your Gut Won’t Shut Up About It
This is the most important one.
Your intuition has been screaming at you that something’s wrong.
That’s why you’re here, reading articles about whether he loves you.
You feel it and you know it.
You kinda already have your answer.
He doesn’t love you; he’s pretending, keeping you around for convenience or comfort or because breaking up is hard.
But he’s not in love with you, and somewhere inside, you know that.
You’re just scared to admit it because admitting it means you wasted time or you were fooled.
So you ignore your gut and make excuses for his behavior.
Sometimes you wonder if you are just paranoid or insecure, but you are not.
Your intuition is trying to save you from wasting more time on someone who’s faking it.
So, listen to it.
If these signs feel too familiar to you, you gotta stop pretending you don’t see the signs.
Stop making excuses for him or hoping he’ll change.
Just go.
Heal, and find someone who doesn’t make you Google “signs he’s pretending to love me” when you are supposed to be sleeping.
You’re worth more than fake love.
my boyfriend brings females to my house from his job he claims they have husbands I don’t believe in and he’s constantly getting phone calls from females different hours of the night it says they’re just friends from work I don’t believe him
He does not respect you. You have all you need to take a meaningful and wise decision from that blog post. I wish you good luck